Dealing with Tragedy and Death
The workplace is a social environment, and people in your workplace will inevitable suffer personal loss of some kind. Reacting appropriately in such a delicate situation is critical.
Some tips for dealing with another's grief:
- Keep your message simple - While "I'm sorry for your loss" may seem curt and mechanical, an elaborate greeting-card declaration seems even more insincere.
- Be patient and attentive - In instances where a person cares to discuss the issue, listen patiently and attentively. In many cases, they need to express their grief (and aren't looking for feedback or advice).
- Look for ways to be helpful - The phrase "if there's anything I can do" is a cliche, and often not intended sincerely. Think of something specific you can (and will) do to help, and make a specific offer.
- Don't forget the children - The author suggests that the younger members of a family are often overlooked during times of grief, but it strikes me that you probably need to have a very close relationship with someone before getting involved with the family.
Some specific things to avoid:
- Avoidance - While the situation is awkward and uncomfortable, do not try to avoid the issue by avoiding the person
- Platitudes - There are a lot of trite phrases people drag out in awkward situations. Avoid them.
- Advice - Do not attempt to "solve" the problem by finding an explanation or advising the person how to cope.
- Proselytizing - Unless you are completely familiar with a person's religious beliefs, don't impose your own theology.
- Being judgmental - People express their grief in different ways, some of which seem odd or counterproductive. Don't attempt to tell someone how to behave (or refrain from behaving).
EN: This is another cultural minefield that merits a cautious approach.