Developing Your Ability to Listen
In the present age, people are bombarded with information from various sources, sometimes all at once, and have learned to practice selective attention and selective ignorance. Even those who recognize the importance of listening consider it to be a passive activity.
First, active listening requires focus. You must give the speaker your attention, follow their words, and pay active attention to the message they are sending. Sometimes, this may mean delaying the conversation until you can give the speaker your full attention - most people appreciate your honesty and are flattered that you care enough to want to give them your undivided attention.
You can also listen with your eyes - make note of the barrage of nonverbal communication that the speaker is transmitting. Meanwhile, be aware of your own nonverbal signals to ensure that you are demonstrating your interest and degree of agreement.
Finally, be aware of your own "hot buttons" - in many instances, we can react to a word or turn of phrase rather than the message, often based on our own emotional baggage. Consider what the speaker intends, rather than what you might be incorrectly inferring.