Chapter 11 - The Basics of Good Communication
Communication requires more than two people who take turns talking. As an example, he considers the formulaic comedy patter of Groucho Marx and others of his time, which often consisted of frustrating someone out of talking to them by saying nonsensical things (often making a pun on a word in the straight-man's line). While it's (arguably) laughable to an observer, the result for the other person in the conversation is frustration to the point they break off contact.
The same thing occurs with salesmen interacting with prospects: they simply talk at them, ignoring what they say, and sometimes responding to a specific word with a canned response, regardless of what the prospect actually said.
The author makes a general observation that communication skills are suffering in general: you can see that in e-mail messages and online discussions that people are talking at one another and not listening to what has been said. Basic mechanical issues such as grammar and punctuation also suggest that people are not investing much time or thought in what they say - but this is a minor detail compared to the complete lack of clarity and relevance.
Some basic tips for effective communication are provided:
- Plan your communication. Decide in advance what your goals are and the most important points you want to make before you even begin.
- Respond first. Before introducing topic you wish to discuss, consider the last thing that the other person said (or wrote) to you and make sure you are not ignoring them.
- Focus on your main point. When in doubt, follow the basic formula of "tell them what you're going to tell them, then tell it to them, and then tell them what you told them."
- Control the next point. Maintaining control of a conversation means directing it to topics you wish to discuss. The key to doing so is to address their statement, but then give them a statement on a topic of your choice to react to, so they must then speak to your agenda.
- Summarize. Critical to making sure you walk away with the same understanding, end each discussion with a reiteration of what was discussed and agreed upon, and what will be discussed at the next meeting. If the discussion is lengthy or convoluted, mid-discussion summary helps to clarify and transition.
Applying a formula to conversation rather than letting it evolve naturally may seem a bit stiff, but it makes effective use of the time and avoids rambling, which is something that prospects likely appreciate.
After that, there are a series of random tips:
- Don't expect to settle everything in one discussion. Sometimes you can, but very often the constraints of time or the need to gather information require conversations to break and resume.
- Of particular importance, consider whether the other party wishes to settle things in one discussion. Particularly where there is a point of contention, a break for reflection will be productive, and when conversation resumes it can be settled more easily.
- Conversation is not competitive. Salesmen in particular seem to assume that the other party doesn't want to buy and they take a very aggressive stance to hector them into making a purchase. Most buyers have some level of interest in a product or they wouldn't waste time, and acting as if they had no interest not only wastes time, but is offensive.
- Build your vocabulary - Particularly in B2B sales, it is necessary to speak in the language of your customer. Whether you're selling to a neurosurgeon or a plumber, there are specialized terms they use as a sort of shorthand - and not knowing the language signals that you don't understand their situation or needs.
- Be honest. If you do not believe that what you are saying is accurate and true, you will not be able to convince anyone else to believe it either.