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4: The Emotional Approach to Verbal Communication

Professional speakers aspire to deliver a speech that will be remembered by their audience for years to come, and that will have a profound impact on the lives of at least a few people. The way they do this involves engaging the emotions of the audience.

Chances are good that any speech that you remember today, particularly one you heard years ago, engaged you on an emotional level. These are words that you remember, and those you often recall when facing a difficult decision. Chances also favor that you have heard a great many informational speeches packed with information but delivered in a dispassionate monotone - and that you remember none of those.

Simply sated: emotion is what makes communication memorable. So if you are to be an effective speaker, you must learn to leverage emotions in your speech to leave an indelible mark on the memory of your audience.

Developing Speeches Around Emotions

Very few speakers possess the knowledge of emotion to deliberately craft a speech with the emotions of the audience in mind - but there are many good speakers who successfully do so based on intuition. However, intuition tends to produce inconsistent results and it often seems like sheer luck, even to the speaker himself, that his speech happened to have an impact on his audience.

The author speaks of the intuitive phase though which many speakers go. They generally do not begin with a solid knowledge of emotion and follow their intuition - and may begin to observe the impact that they have on some occasions, then leverage this to improve their future performances.

Indeed, may people who teach others how to speak are also not fully or deliberately aware of emotional impact. They recognize that emotional speeches work, and develop techniques and tricks that leverage them, but fall short of the mark because they know only that these techniques seem to work, without any foundational knowledge that would enable them to understand the reason why.

In his career as a professional speaker, the author went through much this same process - his early success seemed largely accidental, and he was unable to deliver consistently good speeches until he realized the emotional connection for what it was and sought to understand it and more effectively apply the knowledge in practice.

Some speakers can deliver very compelling speeches on talent alone - but only some of the time. Having a systematic approach that you understand is more likely to produce consistent success.

The Concept of the Final Emotion

When preparing a speech, start at the end: consider what you want you audience's final emotional state to be at the end of the speech. This is important because, whatever the journey you have taken the audience on, it is the last impression that makes the message memorable and propels them to action.

While the purpose of a speech is to influence thought and action, the speaker does not have direct control. He cannot force the audience to think or do what he wishes them to do, but can present information that enables them to reach the same conclusion on their own.

People who consider the same set of facts can reach very different conclusions, and this is largely influenced by their emotional state, and for this reason it is critical to carefully plan what that state ought to be and guide them toward it, Otherwise, the information you provide will be filtered through their own emotional state, whatever that happens to be.

This is not to say that the speech needs to be emotionally monotonous, hammering away at the same emotional note all the while, as this becomes overbearing. The audience may be led from one emotional state to another until finally arriving at the desired final emotion the author wishes to convey.

The choice of which emotion to convey depends on the action the speaker is attempting to influence his audience to take, and when he expects them to take it. A very heightened state of strong emotion may be necessary to incent an audience to take dramatic action immediately (such as inciting a riot), but a lower state of a positive emotion may be more in line with a long-term action (such as convincing students to adopt better study habits).

While this seems straightforward, it is not entirely simple, and it may take a great deal of planning to determine which emotional state is most supportive of the action you wish the audience to take, and to correlate it to the speech that will be delivered.

He gives the example of a woman whose job had been eliminated, and who was given the opportunity to speak with various division managers to try to find a place elsewhere in the organization. The problem was that the 10-15 minute presentation she made to each manager at the beginning of an interview left them with a feeling of pity for a person who had worked hard and was being mistreated - but the emotion of pity is not what motivates a manager to hire a candidate.

He mentions that this is often done in entertainment, though often with the sense that the audience should leave a theater on an emotional "high" without having any sense of how they should channel their emotions after the film has ended. The really good movies, the type that draw large audiences for a long period of time and go on to win awards, are those that leave people with an emotion and a sense of purpose. A really good speech should have the same effect.

The Initial Emotion

The most important step in preparing a speech is a clear understanding of the final emotion - but the initial emotion is also critical in achieving that goal.

The initial emotion is not the first one conveyed by the speaker, but the one that the audience is experiencing even before the speech begins. It is the starting point of the journey on which you're going to take them - and you do not decide what it is. You can only attempt to predict it. A good speaker will make an effort to meet the audience at that emotional place at the beginning of the speech.

In some instances, you can better predict the initial emotion because of events and situations of which you are aware. Even then, this is a general sense because you are speaking to many individuals, and not all of them will be in the same mood when they take their seats.

Gaining an awareness requires doing research. If you're about to speak in a foreign nation, you should research the culture and recent events for that nation. If you're about to speak in a corporate meeting, you should research the culture and recent events for that organization. If you're going to speak to a group of doctors, you should research the culture and recent events in the medical profession.

There are certain events - funerals, graduation ceremonies, birthday parties, and the like - for which the speaker can make an educated guess as to the initial emotion of the audience. The emotional overtones of these events are well-known.

In most cases, a speaker doesn't know that much about the audience, even if he is able to do research. The author's advice would be to consider the audience to be emotionally neutral.

Switch to one-to-one conversations: the better we know a person, the better we can gauge their mood according to their character. When meeting with a stranger, we often tap-dance in the first few minutes of conversation to assess the initial emotional state of the person. This is the reason so many business meetings begin with small-talk and the serious issues are discussed only after gauging the other party's emotional state.

A speaker must meet the audience at their emotional level. One way to do this is to express that you are feeling the same emotions. Consider that most politicians speaking in the wake of a tragic event communicate that they are feeling the same as their audience: "I was shocked to learn ..." or "I am saddened by ..." or whatnot.

(EN: This is done so often that it has become recognized as a device and regarded as disingenuous, so it should not be the default approach.)

In other instances, particularly when a speaker is an outsider to a group, it I not possible to do so. In that instance it often helps to use narrative, to suggest an event in which the speaker experienced emotions similar to what his audience is feeling, and in that way to make an empathetic connection to them. Admittedly, this is weaker, but a weak connection is better than none at all.

(EN: This, too, seems a bit corny, and can be terrible if the audience feels that the speaker is patronizing them. It is also so overused that audiences hold doubt as to whether the speaker is telling the truth, or simply "making up" his story.)

At the very least, the speaker should seek to match the emotional level nonverbally - gestures, posture, and vocal quality. To be excited in front of a stoic audience or stoic in front of an agitated audience not only fails to create a connection - but creates a sense of disconnection.

In many instances, a speaker uses the opening of his speech to connect with the audience's initial emotion, and then transition them to the first step in the emotional journey on which he intends to take them.

The Emotional Journey of the Audience

In essence, a speech guides the audience on a journey from their initial emotion to the final emotional state desired by the speaker.

The author uses the metaphor of a wilderness guide, underscoring a few key ideas:

Sidebar: M.C. Escher and Transitions

The author mentions the art of Escher, who is known for depicting physically impossible concepts such as water flowing uphill or a stairway on which people are constantly walking upward. The "trick" to his illustrations lies in handling transitions.

That is, in the image of the infinite stairwell, the four flights of stairs are connected at the corners, and making the corners seem realistic and plausible requires a great deal of attention to the way one stairwell transitions to the next. If executed perfectly, the viewer doesn't notice a transition has made at all, and their eye moves smoothly from one flight to the next.

In other illustrations, Escher creates the sense of metamorphoses, as an interlocking pattern of tiles shaped like fish become an interlocking of files shaped like birds. In these sketches there is a point at which the shapes take on a mutated form, somewhat like a fish and somewhat like a bird, but it is impossible to indicate with certainty any single point at which the fish become birds.

This is exactly the way a speaker should handle transitions in his speech - particularly in terms of emotion. If a speech delivers people from apprehension to enthusiasm, there will be a period in which their emotion is neither one nor the other, but a little of both, that gently transitions to the final destination.

The Speaking Tools

The author speaks of the various "tools" available to the speaker, which includes the script of the speech itself, various asides he may make, the various kinds of nonverbal communication, the stage and presentation props, and even the way in which he is introduced.

Each speaker uses these tools differently. Some rely heavily on slides, others often use stories and jokes, some will hide behind the podium, and so on. By default, many speakers use the tools in a manner that is most familiar and comfortable to them. But to be successful, a speaker must choose and use the tools that are most effective in delivering the speech and leaving the audience with the appropriate final emotion.

More will be said later in the book on the selection and use of tools in speaking.

Working With Emotions on a Macro Scale

Whereas success in interacting with an individual depends on you ability to gauge one person's emotions, speaking to a crowd requires you to be able to read the emotions of a larger group, in order to determine whether your speech is having the desired impact, or the audience's emotions are becoming out of alignment with your purpose.

This is not to say that emotional messages cannot be subtle, but if they are not aligned with the large-scale emotions, the subtlety will be lose and the speaker will not accomplish his purpose. In fact, "this alignment could be the difference between a good speech and a great one."

The author mentions that an entertaining speaker can construct his speech to take the audience on a full-circle journey - a sort of emotional thrill ride that ends back at the place it began. The audience may have fund and be captivated by such a speech, but it does not accomplish anything in the way of motivating them to take action. The author suggests that a speaker who uses this pattern "does himself a great disservice."

(EN: I can think of instances in which this is entirely valid, particularly in business. A leader's ceremonial speech at the end of the year may not need to make a significant change, but to encourage continued performance - the point of which is to take a moment to get people to recognize and take pride in their achievement, but to keep doing what they have been doing rather than to do something different in the following year.)

The goal of the speaker, in the author's sense, is to motivate people to change behavior, and in order to do that his speech must move them from one emotional state to another - but again, the skills used to encourage an individual must be adapted to the macro scale. Some can be adapted, others may need to be abandoned, and new skills must be learned appropriate to dealing with groups rather than individuals.

Finally, he concedes that structural alignment is so rare that it is absent, even in a number of speeches considered to be very good - his sense that is that if those speakers could have aligned the emotions evoked on the macro level to those evoked in each individual in attendance, they would not have been merely "very good" but could have been legendary.